1 hrs 46 mins | POETRY | Australian and OceanianI wrote these poems incrementally, but collated, edited, and recorded them collectively. A process that was at first therapeutic and then brutally revealing. A lot of the pieces touch upon regret, lost possibilities, and missed opportunities born of trauma, neglect, mental illness, and fear, as well as the desperation that comes when you find yourself searching for hope inside of darkness.
What could’ve been and what is, are not the same thing. A lot of my pain comes from an inability to reconcile those two disparate facets of my existence. I know I can’t have everything I want, no one ca...
I wrote these poems incrementally, but collated, edited, and recorded them collectively. A process that was at first therapeutic and then brutally revealing. A lot of the pieces touch upon regret, lost possibilities, and missed opportunities born of trauma, neglect, mental illness, and fear, as well as the desperation that comes when you find yourself searching for hope inside of darkness.
What could’ve been and what is, are not the same thing. A lot of my pain comes from an inability to reconcile those two disparate facets of my existence. I know I can’t have everything I want, no one can. But when you are broken, it can be hard to know what you want, let alone have any idea of how to attain it.
Thus, I write. I write to heal, to express the darkness within, to get it onto the page, and into the light. To understand myself and to understand my understanding of the world.
If you resonate with my words I encourage you to write some of your own - it will help.
what could have been
is broken
and what is
feels like a dream
these words served
as a temporary anchor
against the swirling chaos
of a corrupted soul
longing for rest
writing
saved my life
editing
almost killed me
i hope
it was
worth it
| # | Title | Duration |
|---|---|---|
| 1. | 000 intro |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 2. | Introduction |
2 mins 00 secs |
| 3. | A Day Without Fear |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 4. | A Moment Fragmented |
1 mins 25 secs |
| 5. | A Moment That Will Never Come |
2 mins 49 secs |
| 6. | a page to listen |
0 mins 27 secs |
| 7. | A Requiem For What Could Have Been |
1 mins 22 secs |
| 8. | A Simulacrum Of Thought |
0 mins 36 secs |
| 9. | A Sun Shower |
0 mins 36 secs |
| 10. | A System Of Inequality |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 11. | a waterfall shaping rock |
0 mins 38 secs |
| 12. | Abyss |
0 mins 18 secs |
| 13. | All I See |
0 mins 15 secs |
| 14. | Allure |
0 mins 33 secs |
| 15. | An Appology To The Future |
1 mins 21 secs |
| 16. | Anger |
0 mins 19 secs |
| 17. | autum leaves |
0 mins 20 secs |
| 18. | blessed with lifes baggage |
0 mins 50 secs |
| 19. | Candle |
0 mins 27 secs |
| 20. | Capitalistic Desire |
0 mins 31 secs |
| 21. | Chaotic Beauty |
0 mins 32 secs |
| 22. | Closure |
0 mins 28 secs |
| 23. | Contemplating The Future |
0 mins 41 secs |
| 24. | crescent moon |
0 mins 14 secs |
| 25. | Dad |
0 mins 27 secs |
| 26. | Dark Clouds |
0 mins 15 secs |
| 27. | Do You Love Me, Or Just The Idea Of Me |
1 mins 05 secs |
| 28. | Dont Let Me Ruin You |
1 mins 00 secs |
| 29. | Enlightenment |
0 mins 28 secs |
| 30. | Enough |
0 mins 11 secs |
| 31. | escape their fate |
0 mins 44 secs |
| 32. | Existing Just To Exist |
0 mins 33 secs |
| 33. | Expectations |
0 mins 14 secs |
| 34. | Fear |
0 mins 16 secs |
| 35. | fever dreams |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 36. | Flee |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 37. | Fleeting |
0 mins 21 secs |
| 38. | For As Long As I Have Eyes |
1 mins 18 secs |
| 39. | Forever Cursed To Sing |
1 mins 03 secs |
| 40. | Forgotten |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 41. | Foul Mistress Of Time |
0 mins 43 secs |
| 42. | He Accepts |
0 mins 47 secs |
| 43. | Here Lies My Head |
1 mins 58 secs |
| 44. | i drift |
1 mins 04 secs |
| 45. | I Envy The Devout |
0 mins 42 secs |
| 46. | I Fear Your Apology |
1 mins 27 secs |
| 47. | i step off my mind |
0 mins 28 secs |
| 48. | I Struggle |
1 mins 03 secs |
| 49. | I Took It For Granted |
1 mins 06 secs |
| 50. | I Wonder |
0 mins 23 secs |
| 51. | If I Continue |
0 mins 52 secs |
| 52. | If I Were |
0 mins 11 secs |
| 53. | Impact |
0 mins 16 secs |
| 54. | In Your Absence |
0 mins 53 secs |
| 55. | Inertia |
0 mins 26 secs |
| 56. | Infestation |
1 mins 06 secs |
| 57. | Irony |
0 mins 31 secs |
| 58. | I've Sold You My Soul |
1 mins 12 secs |
| 59. | Just A Fiction |
1 mins 08 secs |
| 60. | leave |
0 mins 36 secs |
| 61. | Left Wanting |
0 mins 50 secs |
| 62. | Legacy |
0 mins 27 secs |
| 63. | Let Me In |
1 mins 38 secs |
| 64. | Life Is Just A Costume |
0 mins 22 secs |
| 65. | Life To Avoid |
0 mins 40 secs |
| 66. | Life |
0 mins 25 secs |
| 67. | Lifeblood |
0 mins 22 secs |
| 68. | Lost To Time |
0 mins 29 secs |
| 69. | Maybe |
0 mins 12 secs |
| 70. | Mere Imanginings |
0 mins 49 secs |
| 71. | Mere Thought |
0 mins 15 secs |
| 72. | Modern Day Pesents |
1 mins 08 secs |
| 73. | Moment |
0 mins 47 secs |
| 74. | More Than Just... This |
0 mins 39 secs |
| 75. | Mourning Song |
0 mins 34 secs |
| 76. | Need |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 77. | Neurosis |
0 mins 57 secs |
| 78. | Nevertheless |
0 mins 17 secs |
| 79. | Nightmare |
0 mins 39 secs |
| 80. | Nightmares & Fantasies |
0 mins 51 secs |
| 81. | Not Safe |
0 mins 17 secs |
| 82. | Notice Me |
1 mins 22 secs |
| 83. | Of My Self |
0 mins 19 secs |
| 84. | On The Brink |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 85. | On The Feild Of Failure |
0 mins 35 secs |
| 86. | Once More |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 87. | Panic Attack |
1 mins 15 secs |
| 88. | Perhaps |
1 mins 26 secs |
| 89. | Pretentious Words |
0 mins 32 secs |
| 90. | Primal Attraction |
0 mins 14 secs |
| 91. | Questions |
0 mins 41 secs |
| 92. | Rate Me |
0 mins 38 secs |
| 93. | Red Flag Chaser |
1 mins 07 secs |
| 94. | Regret |
0 mins 25 secs |
| 95. | Release |
0 mins 51 secs |
| 96. | remember |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 97. | Running |
0 mins 14 secs |
| 98. | Sacrifices |
0 mins 18 secs |
| 99. | Sad Zac Is Sad |
1 mins 45 secs |
| 100. | Seed |
1 mins 12 secs |
| 101. | Seen Through Their Eyes |
1 mins 07 secs |
| 102. | Selfie |
0 mins 21 secs |
| 103. | Silence |
0 mins 10 secs |
| 104. | so why |
0 mins 20 secs |
| 105. | Sorry My Boy |
0 mins 39 secs |
| 106. | spider |
0 mins 18 secs |
| 107. | Suffering Without Hope |
0 mins 45 secs |
| 108. | That Comes With A Question |
0 mins 36 secs |
| 109. | The Agnostic's Plea |
1 mins 02 secs |
| 110. | The Artists Delima |
1 mins 18 secs |
| 111. | The Candle Burns |
0 mins 27 secs |
| 112. | The Death Of A Friend |
0 mins 40 secs |
| 113. | The Devil Speaks |
0 mins 25 secs |
| 114. | The Knife Of Hypocrisy |
0 mins 59 secs |
| 115. | The Love That's Real |
1 mins 00 secs |
| 116. | The Mountain |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 117. | The Point Of Trying |
2 mins 07 secs |
| 118. | the silence between words |
0 mins 23 secs |
| 119. | There Is No Rush |
0 mins 15 secs |
| 120. | These Words |
0 mins 23 secs |
| 121. | They See |
0 mins 32 secs |
| 122. | This Day Is About To End |
1 mins 11 secs |
| 123. | Those Few Words |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 124. | title requim |
0 mins 09 secs |
| 125. | To Purchase The Moon |
1 mins 11 secs |
| 126. | tomorrow |
0 mins 10 secs |
| 127. | Toward Eternity |
0 mins 39 secs |
| 128. | Trapped And Alone |
1 mins 26 secs |
| 129. | Trapped |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 130. | Triggered |
0 mins 47 secs |
| 131. | Uncontainable By The Bondage Of Words |
1 mins 00 secs |
| 132. | Unfortunately |
0 mins 37 secs |
| 133. | Verses Like Curses |
1 mins 15 secs |
| 134. | Vestiges Of Civilisation |
1 mins 00 secs |
| 135. | We Two Together |
0 mins 52 secs |
| 136. | What Is Truth Other Than Fiction |
2 mins 16 secs |
| 137. | What You Could Have Been |
0 mins 32 secs |
| 138. | Without |
0 mins 20 secs |
| 139. | Work Life Balance |
0 mins 15 secs |
| 140. | Worthy |
0 mins 24 secs |
| 141. | years on repeat |
0 mins 13 secs |
| 142. | Your Truth |
0 mins 39 secs |
| 143. | 000 Conclusion to requim |
0 mins 40 secs |
Download app from
